1st December 2008,
4.30pm Monday. It's Moody Monday for me. Maybe wake up wrong side of the bed, bad dreams last night, plus not enough of sleep, plus with my left deaf ear giving me much problems. Right eyes swollen. Oh, what's wrong with me, what's wrong?.. It's hard to imagine life be without sounds, without sights. Need to catch the momentum of persuing life, living life to the fullest. Learn to learn to journey on, need to learn to talk more.. need to learn to express.
Life can be complicated, but happiness is really pretty simple.
Here's some of the Inspirational Quotes that cheered up my Monday:
The heart that gives, gathers - Marianne Moore
Change your thoughts and change your world - Norman Vincent Peale
If you don't stand for something, you will fall for nothing.
Burn brightly without buring out - Richard Biggs
Nothing happens, but first a dream - Carl Sandburg
It is one of the most compensations in life... that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Sometimes in the winds of change we find our true direction.
Throw your heart over the fence and the rest will follow - Norman Vincent Peale
Courage does not always roar. Sometimes it is a quiet voice at the end of the day saying..
"I will try again tomorrow." - Mary Anne Radmacher
Laughter is an instant vacation. - Milton Berle
The best sermons are lived, not preached. - Cowboy Wisdom
The only things that stand between a person and what they want in life are the will to try it,
and the faith to believe it's possible - Rich Devos
Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back
and realize they were the big things - Robert Brault
It's choice - not chance - that determines your destiny - Jean Nidetch
To love and to be loved is to feel the sun from both sides - David Viscott
Keep your face to the sunshine and you will not see the shadows - Helen Keller
Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless - Mother Teresa
Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit there - Will Rogers
Joy is a light that fills you with Hope, Faith and Love.
Monday, December 01, 2008
Monday, November 24, 2008
Ready for a Change?
24th November 2008,
5.00pm, Monday great. Yeah.. am blogging from my desk, been a while since my last blog in the office. Today's good, slow and steady. Patient load reducing, good and bad news. Good news because can relax a bit and take things slower. Bad news - with the economic turmoils, low volume means company not making money, means low bonus, less benefit or maybe retrenchment? But hospital not so much affected, don't think we will retrench hospital staff. Company are taking every form of cost containment measures in this bad time. Question asked, am I affected? Hmm.. good question. Guess everyone's affected, the difference is the intensity of the impact to us.
"Change, change.. change". Keep hearing this word, right from March 8th election till now. Am I ready for a change in my life? I've been contemplating on this for long.. maybe it's time for me to put it into action? Moving through the stages of change requires effort and energy for thinking, planning and doing.
(Proachaska and DiClemente Model)
Which stage am I now? In between contemplating and determination? Maybe yeah, praying that I can have the determination to change and put it into action and move along, not turning back? Or maybe I am in preparation time.. to equip myself for new challenges ahead? But whatever it is, am gonna have faith on Him, and journey on with Him!
5.00pm, Monday great. Yeah.. am blogging from my desk, been a while since my last blog in the office. Today's good, slow and steady. Patient load reducing, good and bad news. Good news because can relax a bit and take things slower. Bad news - with the economic turmoils, low volume means company not making money, means low bonus, less benefit or maybe retrenchment? But hospital not so much affected, don't think we will retrench hospital staff. Company are taking every form of cost containment measures in this bad time. Question asked, am I affected? Hmm.. good question. Guess everyone's affected, the difference is the intensity of the impact to us.
"Change, change.. change". Keep hearing this word, right from March 8th election till now. Am I ready for a change in my life? I've been contemplating on this for long.. maybe it's time for me to put it into action? Moving through the stages of change requires effort and energy for thinking, planning and doing.
(Proachaska and DiClemente Model)
Which stage am I now? In between contemplating and determination? Maybe yeah, praying that I can have the determination to change and put it into action and move along, not turning back? Or maybe I am in preparation time.. to equip myself for new challenges ahead? But whatever it is, am gonna have faith on Him, and journey on with Him!
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
From the North to the South...
16th September 2008,
2.30pm Tuesday. Yeap yeap, am on leave today. On leave since last Saturday but will be back this Wed (tomorrow) *cries* Am blogging from Celina's desk, the line is lagging, regardless am happy at least I can keep myself occupied while she's working. Mum's doing Sudoku, hehehe.. she's pretty contented staying at home, helping sis doing house chores, tidy up the room, and with her Sudoku, she can just sit whole day just to complete the mission. Myself, okay not too bad, at least it's free time, away from work, away from Penang, taking things slowly and relaxing, spending time with family and love ones- worth the trip.
It's Sept and my last blog was in March. Never knew I've been overly occupied lately. Wish I have more time, or maybe I should make time instead of always complaining not enough time? WK has been back from Maternity Leave since Aug and I've passed over CDR to her, so it free me up to be more focus on the other areas of inconsistency. Yet dunno why I still feel not enough time, it's like so many things to do, and have no ending to my work? it's like accumulate and once you've settled one task, 5 more are awaiting your attention? Oh, probably it's just part and pacel of work life- Job will never ending as long as you're employed. Just need to learn to balance my life, to really search what interest me most and go for it.
Ya, I've been with RDA for almost half year? RDA stands for Horse Riding for Disable Association, it's one of the NGO and self-funded. Am finding joy to just be a side walker, helping the disable kids to mount up the horse, playing games with them while riding.. and it's nice, an eye opener for me seeing life thru' this little wonderful kids. They're just so special, and life is just more than what meet the eyes. It's our perspective, it's the way we live.. it's the journey on without regrets, to live life to the fullest, as a gift from God. Am reading thru' my blogs, and discover am such a negative person. I don't wanna be a complainer, I wanna change on that.. to be positive, to smile at the rain, to always give thanks and praise to Him in whatever circumstances.
Lord helps me when I am in doubt, let me to fall in love with You again and again, and nothing will take away Your love from me. Help me in my detour, draw me back to You each time am about to fail. Guide me with Your Spirit that I will hear and obey..
I love this song, it's playing again and again in me, reminding me of my Creator, how He has formed me in my mothers womb, and knew me and loves me as I am...
Creator King, by Don Moen
You, Who made the mountains and the sea
Measured out the universe and you make me
Echoes of the voice that called the worlds to
throughout the ages and now speak to me
You're my Creator King
You, Who made the valleys and the skies
Displayed Your love on far horizons and before my eyes
You, Who lit the stars and set the dawn in time
Called them all by name and now whisper mine
You're my Creator King
Chorus:
Who am I that You are mindful of me
Who am I that You sent Your love on me
You're my Creator King
You, Who made the darkness and the light
Sun and Moon to watch the day and guard the night
The hand that stretched the heavens like a canopy
Reaches down to cover and watch over me
You're my Creator King
2.30pm Tuesday. Yeap yeap, am on leave today. On leave since last Saturday but will be back this Wed (tomorrow) *cries* Am blogging from Celina's desk, the line is lagging, regardless am happy at least I can keep myself occupied while she's working. Mum's doing Sudoku, hehehe.. she's pretty contented staying at home, helping sis doing house chores, tidy up the room, and with her Sudoku, she can just sit whole day just to complete the mission. Myself, okay not too bad, at least it's free time, away from work, away from Penang, taking things slowly and relaxing, spending time with family and love ones- worth the trip.
It's Sept and my last blog was in March. Never knew I've been overly occupied lately. Wish I have more time, or maybe I should make time instead of always complaining not enough time? WK has been back from Maternity Leave since Aug and I've passed over CDR to her, so it free me up to be more focus on the other areas of inconsistency. Yet dunno why I still feel not enough time, it's like so many things to do, and have no ending to my work? it's like accumulate and once you've settled one task, 5 more are awaiting your attention? Oh, probably it's just part and pacel of work life- Job will never ending as long as you're employed. Just need to learn to balance my life, to really search what interest me most and go for it.
Ya, I've been with RDA for almost half year? RDA stands for Horse Riding for Disable Association, it's one of the NGO and self-funded. Am finding joy to just be a side walker, helping the disable kids to mount up the horse, playing games with them while riding.. and it's nice, an eye opener for me seeing life thru' this little wonderful kids. They're just so special, and life is just more than what meet the eyes. It's our perspective, it's the way we live.. it's the journey on without regrets, to live life to the fullest, as a gift from God. Am reading thru' my blogs, and discover am such a negative person. I don't wanna be a complainer, I wanna change on that.. to be positive, to smile at the rain, to always give thanks and praise to Him in whatever circumstances.
Lord helps me when I am in doubt, let me to fall in love with You again and again, and nothing will take away Your love from me. Help me in my detour, draw me back to You each time am about to fail. Guide me with Your Spirit that I will hear and obey..
I love this song, it's playing again and again in me, reminding me of my Creator, how He has formed me in my mothers womb, and knew me and loves me as I am...
Creator King, by Don Moen
You, Who made the mountains and the sea
Measured out the universe and you make me
Echoes of the voice that called the worlds to
throughout the ages and now speak to me
You're my Creator King
You, Who made the valleys and the skies
Displayed Your love on far horizons and before my eyes
You, Who lit the stars and set the dawn in time
Called them all by name and now whisper mine
You're my Creator King
Chorus:
Who am I that You are mindful of me
Who am I that You sent Your love on me
You're my Creator King
You, Who made the darkness and the light
Sun and Moon to watch the day and guard the night
The hand that stretched the heavens like a canopy
Reaches down to cover and watch over me
You're my Creator King
Monday, March 17, 2008
Busy Days Ahead
17th March 2008,
It's a tiring Monday, just like what Gavin used to describe, being run down by a truck. Yeah whole body muscle aching and feel so lethagic, as if not been sleeping for days. I missed my bed so much, wanna just stop thinking anything, blanko my head and go into deep deep sedation.
Has been a while didn't update my blog. Looking through previous blogs, I guess I should have at least post one blog a month. It's March and April's coming soon. Time flies...again, am using the same words- TIME FLIES, Time SPEED! So what's the happenings on me? Any updates? I guess if you were to ask my church friends, they'll tell you Shirley has been MIA for a while, MIA= Missing In Action. Yeah, has not been attending Sunday service for 2 consecutive weeks. Went to Ipoh first week of March, went back hometown to vote on second week and last week, also went to Ipoh. Hmm.. has been traveling lots. Tiring, definitely but it's worth the travels :P but I also missed Pr. Sam's sermon. Hmm.. yeah, I hate the feeling of neither here nor there..as if I am hanging on the air..floating around. I wish sister to come back Penang soon, but for me to demand her to come back it's will be a selfish act. I can only trust God's timing. But if she comes back, will it be easy for me to decide on the next course? Mum made some remarks last night. She said I'm so undecided to relocate because am not willing to give up my job, not really because of 'her'. Feel a little disappointed of the remarks. Definitely it'll not be easy for me to 'give up' my current job. But if it's God's will, He will make a new openings for me, won't He?
Life has been tiring and busy. Usually I won'y find such time to sit down and do blogging, will be either at CDR Unit, or back in my room doing all the documentation and PP review, preparing for Sept audits. Oh I hate audits, all the standards and paperwork, it slows me down. Didn't even have time to communicate well with staff. WK going for Maternity leaves soon, and I need to be prepared for the worse scenario if I couldn't get any replacement. Crying deep inside how to overcome this.
This week sermon was good. Both Fernando's sharing and Ps. Timothy's sermon touching on the similar thing, about PASSION. Yes and as I evaluating myself, I realise I've not been passionate as I have been before. Is it due to the things around me? Work matters? Lack of fellowship with Christian, lack of involvement in church? Or stale devotional time?.. Where is my passion? And how to rekindle passion? Where's my talent? I need to rediscover my talent and use it, else it will be taken back from me..
It's a tiring Monday, just like what Gavin used to describe, being run down by a truck. Yeah whole body muscle aching and feel so lethagic, as if not been sleeping for days. I missed my bed so much, wanna just stop thinking anything, blanko my head and go into deep deep sedation.
Has been a while didn't update my blog. Looking through previous blogs, I guess I should have at least post one blog a month. It's March and April's coming soon. Time flies...again, am using the same words- TIME FLIES, Time SPEED! So what's the happenings on me? Any updates? I guess if you were to ask my church friends, they'll tell you Shirley has been MIA for a while, MIA= Missing In Action. Yeah, has not been attending Sunday service for 2 consecutive weeks. Went to Ipoh first week of March, went back hometown to vote on second week and last week, also went to Ipoh. Hmm.. has been traveling lots. Tiring, definitely but it's worth the travels :P but I also missed Pr. Sam's sermon. Hmm.. yeah, I hate the feeling of neither here nor there..as if I am hanging on the air..floating around. I wish sister to come back Penang soon, but for me to demand her to come back it's will be a selfish act. I can only trust God's timing. But if she comes back, will it be easy for me to decide on the next course? Mum made some remarks last night. She said I'm so undecided to relocate because am not willing to give up my job, not really because of 'her'. Feel a little disappointed of the remarks. Definitely it'll not be easy for me to 'give up' my current job. But if it's God's will, He will make a new openings for me, won't He?
Life has been tiring and busy. Usually I won'y find such time to sit down and do blogging, will be either at CDR Unit, or back in my room doing all the documentation and PP review, preparing for Sept audits. Oh I hate audits, all the standards and paperwork, it slows me down. Didn't even have time to communicate well with staff. WK going for Maternity leaves soon, and I need to be prepared for the worse scenario if I couldn't get any replacement. Crying deep inside how to overcome this.
This week sermon was good. Both Fernando's sharing and Ps. Timothy's sermon touching on the similar thing, about PASSION. Yes and as I evaluating myself, I realise I've not been passionate as I have been before. Is it due to the things around me? Work matters? Lack of fellowship with Christian, lack of involvement in church? Or stale devotional time?.. Where is my passion? And how to rekindle passion? Where's my talent? I need to rediscover my talent and use it, else it will be taken back from me..
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
What is Next?.. Put on a first step..
5th February 2008,
5.30pm Tuesday. Another day will be CNY, will be working for half day tomorrow, then CNY. This year don't really have much CNY mood, probably as we growing the mood just fading. So this year is no exception, gonna celebrate it with simplicity, a reunion dinner with family, then maybe visit one Aunty in Penang, that's all. Gonna start work 3rd day of CNY, don't wanna waste my leave, only when really necessary else will not take off.
Yeah, has been thinking and reflecting on my lives, and also asking God what's next in my life? Am I reaching a point of making some detour? What is installed for me next? Life has been pretty busy lately.. and time speeding through, many times in my life, I stop and question. Yet it's just a question without any action, always 'see how' yet didn't really take a concrite step of faith? FAITH... ya, this word appears very frequently, through sermon, sharing in church etc. Am thinking, whether such season, is it God is challenging me to put some step of faith, before seeing a breakthrough?... A 'first' step, and God will do the rest? Can I be sure if I put that little first step, God will take care of the rest?.. I need the assurance, am too afraid to make a drastic change. Am I not trusting God enough? He who cares for the lilies on the field, He who knows every single of our hairs, He who willing to give up His Son for us, will He not care for us? Oh Shirley... what a little faith, where is my faith? Just a first small step, just like a little mustard seed, that will move mountain... He has a NEXT plans for me, ONLY if I able to step forward the first step.
5.30pm Tuesday. Another day will be CNY, will be working for half day tomorrow, then CNY. This year don't really have much CNY mood, probably as we growing the mood just fading. So this year is no exception, gonna celebrate it with simplicity, a reunion dinner with family, then maybe visit one Aunty in Penang, that's all. Gonna start work 3rd day of CNY, don't wanna waste my leave, only when really necessary else will not take off.
Yeah, has been thinking and reflecting on my lives, and also asking God what's next in my life? Am I reaching a point of making some detour? What is installed for me next? Life has been pretty busy lately.. and time speeding through, many times in my life, I stop and question. Yet it's just a question without any action, always 'see how' yet didn't really take a concrite step of faith? FAITH... ya, this word appears very frequently, through sermon, sharing in church etc. Am thinking, whether such season, is it God is challenging me to put some step of faith, before seeing a breakthrough?... A 'first' step, and God will do the rest? Can I be sure if I put that little first step, God will take care of the rest?.. I need the assurance, am too afraid to make a drastic change. Am I not trusting God enough? He who cares for the lilies on the field, He who knows every single of our hairs, He who willing to give up His Son for us, will He not care for us? Oh Shirley... what a little faith, where is my faith? Just a first small step, just like a little mustard seed, that will move mountain... He has a NEXT plans for me, ONLY if I able to step forward the first step.
Saturday, January 05, 2008
2008 - A year of New Beginning
19th Jan 2008,
12.30pm Saturday. This is my first blog entry in 2008.. has been very long since my last personal blog. Few times trying to put my thoughts in words, but overly concious to express myself, or to be read by others. So this blog in a way has slowly faded off. Need to revive again..
Read Celina's Blog just now, I can see the similarity in us, even though there are few differences here and there. She perceived me as someone who's confident, strong and independant, or..rather successful. Hmm.. am trying to analyse myself, am I fit such qualities? Or what is my real character? I am fearful and wonderfully made,.. and He knew me and carefully manufactured me even in my mother's womb. Yeah, I am complex and special in His sight. As I see the different people that God has brought in my lives, I keep reflecting myself. One thing I know full well about me, I am a 'man-pleaser'. In a way, I mind how others see and perceive me, and in another way, I don't like people to be unhappy. Sometimes, I can be real ignorant of others feelings, yet overall I am a careful person and more of the accomodative type.
Today's title is about "2008, a year of New Beginning". I am fearful what is installed for me in 2008. Even with a long list of Resolutions made before the New Year, am just wonder..whether all these will come to past, whether each of my resolutions will be met, or I will ever get near any of them. However, I gonna just trust it to His Hands and Care.. man can plans but ultimately He is the One that make it works. Am checking on myself 'spiritually' for the past weeks. Last night CG was good. I thank God for my CG, even tho' it's not as exciting or happening as my previous CG with all the Young Adults, but Shekinah CG has many wonderful people, and 'experienced' people, and 'wise' people. Yeah.. some visitors said we're 'serious' people..ya we are serious in His Words and Works, and I can say I learned a whole lots of wisdom from the Cell. Last night we were sharing about "Facets of Faith" in Isa 54: 1. Faith Response 2. Faith Actions 3. Faith Walk. I am encouraged to hear so many 'faith' expereinces from the members, and am trying hard to think.. ya, when is the last time I am challenged in 'faith'? Or my life has been pretty easy going for the past years? I hope not to see complacency in my walk. Something must be wrong... Am lacking of passion lately. Where is my focus?
A lot of reflections. This year is the year of NEW Beginning? And it's NEVER too late?..Never too late yeah? What is NEXT for me? What should be my next step? Am I willing to be stretched in my faith walk? And to be obedience in following Him? Where is my focus at this moment?.. Work? Family? Church? Relationship?
12.30pm Saturday. This is my first blog entry in 2008.. has been very long since my last personal blog. Few times trying to put my thoughts in words, but overly concious to express myself, or to be read by others. So this blog in a way has slowly faded off. Need to revive again..
Read Celina's Blog just now, I can see the similarity in us, even though there are few differences here and there. She perceived me as someone who's confident, strong and independant, or..rather successful. Hmm.. am trying to analyse myself, am I fit such qualities? Or what is my real character? I am fearful and wonderfully made,.. and He knew me and carefully manufactured me even in my mother's womb. Yeah, I am complex and special in His sight. As I see the different people that God has brought in my lives, I keep reflecting myself. One thing I know full well about me, I am a 'man-pleaser'. In a way, I mind how others see and perceive me, and in another way, I don't like people to be unhappy. Sometimes, I can be real ignorant of others feelings, yet overall I am a careful person and more of the accomodative type.
Today's title is about "2008, a year of New Beginning". I am fearful what is installed for me in 2008. Even with a long list of Resolutions made before the New Year, am just wonder..whether all these will come to past, whether each of my resolutions will be met, or I will ever get near any of them. However, I gonna just trust it to His Hands and Care.. man can plans but ultimately He is the One that make it works. Am checking on myself 'spiritually' for the past weeks. Last night CG was good. I thank God for my CG, even tho' it's not as exciting or happening as my previous CG with all the Young Adults, but Shekinah CG has many wonderful people, and 'experienced' people, and 'wise' people. Yeah.. some visitors said we're 'serious' people..ya we are serious in His Words and Works, and I can say I learned a whole lots of wisdom from the Cell. Last night we were sharing about "Facets of Faith" in Isa 54: 1. Faith Response 2. Faith Actions 3. Faith Walk. I am encouraged to hear so many 'faith' expereinces from the members, and am trying hard to think.. ya, when is the last time I am challenged in 'faith'? Or my life has been pretty easy going for the past years? I hope not to see complacency in my walk. Something must be wrong... Am lacking of passion lately. Where is my focus?
A lot of reflections. This year is the year of NEW Beginning? And it's NEVER too late?..Never too late yeah? What is NEXT for me? What should be my next step? Am I willing to be stretched in my faith walk? And to be obedience in following Him? Where is my focus at this moment?.. Work? Family? Church? Relationship?
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